Its all about the money
by Mikuro Kurayami
Summary: NERV is running out of funds and its up to Misato to sacrifice herself for the future of mankind. The other kids are experiencing a broke teen crisis, how will they get themselves out of this?


It's all about the money: by Kurayami-chan 

_ Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion (wish I did). It's the property of GAINAX, Hideaki Anno and other people whom made this wonderful anime possible!_

Thursday 15:00 pm NERV Headquarters 

"Don't give me that blank, spaced out look!" Ritsuko yelled pounding her balled fist on the commander's desk. Pieces of paper came spewing around.

"I tell you, we really need to do this. NERV is running out of funds" Was all his reply  
"The cargo shall be delivered here tomorrow Dr. Akagi. You will see that nothing is damaged or we have to send them back," Fuyutsuki told her "Let Lt. Ibuki and Major Katsuragi assist you."

"And Doctor Akagi, failure is not an option" Gendo hid a smug smile beneath his hands that were placed over them.

Friday. 9:47 am Tokyo-3 Docking bay 

"Harumph. What's taking it so long" Misato whined the next day. The three ladies were in Misato's car waiting for the shipment to arrive.

"I love the sea breeze in my hair. It makes me feel relaxed" Maya mused closing her eyes.

"Don't relax too much or we'll miss the ship" Ritsuko joked and turned to Misato "Why grumpy Misato? Woke up at the wrong side of the bed?"

"The commander spoke with me before we left this morning." She started "He said that I have a meeting in Tokyo-2 tomorrow. He said that it was a special job and I'd get paid half a million US dollars everyday for a week."

"Wow! That's great" Maya grinned excitedly "What's wrong with that?"

"Who'd watch the children? Kaji can't do it because he's coming with me! I don't want World War 3 to start in my apartment while I'm gone" Misato buried her face with her hands.

"Problem solved" Ritsuko replied coolly

"What do you mean sempai?" Maya asked puzzled. Misato had the same look.

"Makoto could baby-sit for you" Ritsuko told them "And knowing Makoto, he'd be more than pleased to do the job" she joked winking at Misato. Maya giggled uncontrollably.

"Ah here's the ship, right on time" Misato interrupted them looking at a distance.

"Remember that I do the talking here" Ritsuko told her with her usual serious tone.

"Yes sempai" Maya replied dutifully.

Saturday. 7:16 am Misato's Apartment 

Asuka woke up the next morning. She rubbed her eyes and headed straight for the kitchen. She sat down on the table and rested her head on her arm

"Ohayo Asuka-chan"

"Mmmm… Ohayo Shinji"

"Ohayo Asuka" Shinji sat beside her

"Ohayo Shinji…"

'Wait a sec. If Shinji's beside me, then who's…' Asuka turned her head to the other person and rubbed her eyes in disbelief.

"LT. HYUGA MAKOTO!?!?!" She exploded "What are you doing here?!!!"

"Ahh didn't Misato-san tell you? I'm here to baby-sit you two for a week while Misato-san's gone" Makoto replied grinning

"Where's Misato?" Shinji asked puzzled

"She had a meeting in Tokyo-2. I don't know, something about money" Makoto thought hard "Anyway, with me around you're in safe hands" he assured them both

"What are you cooking?" Shinji asked suspiciously

"Ah oh this. It's oatmeal" He replied grinning

Shinji started to sweat drop heavily "I think the fire's too…"

* BOOM * Oatmeal came flying everywhere

"Everything's fine Misato…" Makoto said a little delirious before fainting.

Asuka wiped oatmeal from her face and tasted it "It needs more sugar, though"

Shinji shook his head and sighed, "This is going to be a looooong week"

Monday 13:37 pm Tokyo-2 

"You want me to do WHAT?!" Misato exploded glaring angrily at a bald man, leaning across a neat desk, towering over him.

"C-Calm down Miss Katsuragi" the bald man trembled wiping sweat from her forehead. He looked down Misato's face and on her chest. "It's no big deal, we'll start tomorrow morning…"

Misato saw what he was doing and quickly sat back across him "What to you mean NO BIG DEAL?!? It is a big deal! Did the commander approve of this?" she turned to Kaji who was standing next to her

"Yes he did, he said you'd be perfect for the job Katsuragi" Kaji replied.

"Mister Kageuya I trust you with this project of yours and the safety of our NERV major" Kaji told him seriously "If anything happens to her, you would have to deal with NERV and pay the damages"

"Uhh. Yes Mr. Ryoji" Kageuya nodded grimly

Friday 21:11 pm Misato's apartment 

"I wonder what Misato's doing in Tokyo-2" Shinji asked Asuka later that night. Both were watching Rurouni Kenshin reruns on TV. Makoto had ordered Chinese food for their dinner and went to bed early. He told them he had a huge headache and needed to rest.

"Maya told me that it had something to do with the shipment that came yesterday. I think your father's planning to do something about funds" Asuka replied

"Really? I hope they do something. I'm running out of money"

"Yeah me too. Would you believe that I only have a hundred yen?"

"Um can you lend it to me? I need it for my biology project" Shinji asked shyly

"Fat chance Third child, I need it for my project too you know. Why don't you ask Wonder girl?" Asuka glared at him dryly

"I did, she told me she already used it for the project"

"Why not Makoto? He gets more than we do"

"I asked him a while ago and he told me he had to pay his rent"

"Why not your father?"

"He told me NERV needs the money for more important things"

"Why don't you just shut up and watch TV. Kenshin's ready to fight Shishio already and I don't want to miss it"

The show stopped and a TV commercial about exploding spatulas started. Asuka yawned and decided to take a quick nap before Kenshin starts. Suddenly…

'Zankoku na Tenshi no Youni…' A plushie toy of Eva Shogoki showed up in the TV screen surrounded by city debris and a mist floated in the background.

'Shonen yo shinwa ni nare~~' Eva Zerogoki and Nigoki appeared behind it.

"Asuka look…" Shinji tried waking her up

"Dumkofp… I am" Asuka replied eyes wide open. "Shinji… what the…"

Misato appeared wearing an official NERV two-piece bathing suit that Asuka always wanted.

"Hey, why is Misato wearing that official NERV two-piece bathing suit?! I wanted those but they wouldn't give it to me!!" Asuka whined

Suddenly Makoto just came out of the room. "REALLY??!?" He looked like he was drooling in front of the TV.

"Shh…" Shinji scolded them and continued to listen to Misato.

"Hii~ I'm Major Misato Katsuragi of the NERV headquarters in Tokyo-3" Misato jumped from what seemed like a tall building. Makoto almost fainted on the spot.

Asuka made a face "Eeww…Misato's are soo…"

"…Bouncy" Shinji continued nodding.

Five kids started to crowd near Misato. "Help us Miss Misato! There's an enemy going to kill us!" *insert big bulgy eyes look here* "What are we going to do?!"

"Fear not little Children, NERV will save you" Misato recited sounding like a super hero (or the Tick) "The Evangelion pilots will stop them"

Suddenly a loud and very whiney "Anta baka!?" was heard. In the shadows appeared five plushie pilots.

"Oh look! It's the Eva pilots!!" the kids squealed in joy as they got each respective plushie.

A girl with short hair got the Asuka, another with pigtails got the Rei, a fat boy got the Shinji, A geeky one got Touji and a mean looking one got the Kaworu. They all flashed their plushies in front of the camera. The three Eva plushies were held by Misato

"Batteries not included" Misato winked at the screen

"Isn't there a Misato plushie??" Makoto wondered loudly. Asuka and Shinji had huge sweat drops on their heads.

Same day, same time Suzahara Touji's residence 

"OH MY GOD!!!!!" Kensuke had his mouth wide open in front of the TV screen. Kensuke and Touji were watching re-runs of an old anime Rurouni Kenshin. Touji offered him to stay for the night since Kensuke's TV were in for repairs

"Did you just see what I saw?" Touji asked appalled

"Yeah, and this isn't a dream" Kensuke agreed

"I knew that they were bouncy," Touji told himself out loud.

"I should have recorded that commercial too!!!" Kensuke complained.

"Don't worry, I bet that commercial would appear in other channels" Touji got the TV remote and started channel surfing while Kensuke got the DVD remote, his finger prepared to press the record button.

Friday 22:54 Suzahara Touji's residence 

"I got it!!!" Kensuke cried out in victory.

"Good! Let's get ready!!" Both boys did a high five.

"We can make this a business, 3000 yen each CD!!" Kensuke said dreamily

"And we'll become filthy rich!!!!!" Touji added

"But first, we have to watch it to see if I got it right"

"Yeah, watch it"

"Woah momma, look at 'em go!!!" Kensuke cheered

Touji whistled in approval

Saturday 2:34am Suzahara Touji's residence 

"Oh man, I can do this all night!!" Touji remarked

"We'll do it again!" Kensuke pressed the rewind button and stopped it just as soon as he saw the screen showed Misato ready to jump off.

Saturday 3:22am 

"And again!"

3:43am 

"And again!"

4:03am 

"And again!"

5:30am 

"Why don't we try it slowly?" Touji suggested

"Good idea" Kensuke pushed the slow button.

Saturday 11:41 am Tokyo-3 Domestic Airport

"That was sick?! Why did my voice sound like a whiney brat?!" Asuka demanded when Misato arrived from Tokyo-2. She was picked up by the pilots plus Kensuke who wanted to tag along.

"You sound like a whiney brat anyway…" Touji muttered to himself.

Asuka didn't seem to hear "And why did you wear the official NERV bathing suit!?!"

"And why did Ode to joy sounded like an octave higher?" Kaworu wondered, "I do not sound like a girl do I?"

"How did you know?" Rei inquired

"I saw a kid holding my plushie along the way here," he replied to her. "I also say the commercial in TV"

"Oh man, I saw it too! It was soooo bouncy" Touji commented and Asuka elbowed him in the stomach. He bent over and howled in pain.

"Die Pervert!!!! You're looking at my panties again!!!!!!" She remarked and started kicking him in the shin. Kaworu and Shinji desperately tried to stop her from doing further damage.

"Calm down, I don't who did those voice recording in the plushies OK? But I still got some for you" Misato gave each of them their own plushies. Kensuke got the three Evas.

Rei squeezed her plushie and it said, "I am not a doll…" She blinked cluelessly.

Asuka squeezed hers and it said. "ANTA BAKA?!" She made a face

Shinji squeezed his and it said, "I must runaway…" He sweat dropped hearing himself saying that.

Touji squeezed his and it said, "Misato is a babe…" He froze solid.

Kaworu reluctantly squeezed his and it hummed Ode to joy…in the wrong octave

All of them sighed heavily.

Monday 12:41pm Tokyo-3 Junior High Cafeteria 

"What do you think Kensuke and Touji are doing, Asuka?" Hikari asked Asuka while they were walking out of the cafeteria.

"Hump, if I know them, they're probably selling CD'c of that commercial Misato starred on" Asuka pouted and rolled her eyes.

"Oh, that one" Hikari looked disgusted and wiped some crumbs that fell on her skirt. "I didn't like the editing of that commercial, I think that they should have taken out that certain part"

"Hn" Asuka grunted, "I should have been in that commercial, and would you believe?! That certain doll of mine sounds like a whiney brat?!"

"It's OK Asuka" Hikari assured her. "I think it's really cute! I got some for my sisters and myself. One of them seems to have a liking for Kaworu…" she glanced to where he was sited, next to Rei, Shinji and the other boys.

"What did you get?" Asuka inquired curiously

"Uhh… I got a doll of you of course" she replied quickly then blushed, "I got a Touji one too…"

Asuka yawned, " I didn't know you would do that." She said sarcastically but only to herself.

"At least you have the money you need for our projects" Hikari tried change the subject.

"I guess so, hurry Hikari, we have to submit these projects to Ms. Inaba."

"Ha, ha, ha!" Touji and Kensuke chorused "We're filthy rich!!!!!"

"Seems you two are good business partners" Kaworu remarked, "Right Rei?"

Rei glanced at him and nodded once.

"But why do you need the money?"

"Well, Kaworu my dear friend, times like these, its best to store money for future interest" Touji explained

"Isn't it too early for you and Hikari to get hitched and get married?" Kensuke joked and laughed at his own joke.

Touji grew crimson "That's not what I meant!" he insisted.

"Sure," Kensuke said sarcastically. "We all know that Hikari has a huge crush on you"

"Cut it out, Aida!" Touji snapped at him.

"Hahahahaahaaaa…. Kensuke danced around like a maniac. "Touji and Hikari are sittin' on a tree…" he started yelling on top of his voice

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G!!!!" The whole cafeteria chanted and started laughing.

Touji felt like he wanted to disappear in a cloud of smoke.

"You're dead meat this time Aida!!!!!!" Touji chased Kensuke out of the cafeteria.

Shinji had a really huge sweat drop on his forehead.

Rei turned to him and said, "It's all about the money…"

Owari 


End file.
